Sunday, July 09, 2006

this week is going to be crazy busy- between work, the wedding next weekend, the bachelorette and rehearsal before that and just my normal craziness. so today i took a chance to look ahead and reflect on what is happening in my life and upon what is coming up in life.

cheryl and tony got engaged last year- they met about 3 months before me and john did. i have known cheryl for over 10 years now and i have never seen her happier than when she met tony. we have gone through a lot together. i don't think she was ever a big fan of john-we never really spoke about it- but at the same time seeing her reach this milestone makes me a little sad. i wonder if the feeling if that is what my life should have been like will ever go away....

at the same time my birthday is fast approaching. all i keep thinking are erin's words.... if you are going to meet anyone you need to make it happen this year. have i met him? possibly... it feels like i could have... at the same time it scares me to be another year older and still not sure of where my life is headed. and then i think about when john was 29 and how excited we both were that year... little did we know he would be gone 4 months after he turned 30..... how strange.... when you think about it all.... how weird can life truly be.

but as i head into my last year in my twenties i am happy--- not just becuase of c. but because of a multitude of things. i feel like i am truly living forward-enjoying my life and whatever it brings...

1 comment:

Pentha said...

Just read the last two entries...

How wonderful to have that feeling again! And yes, scary at the same time.

But don't let someone put you on a timetable of "needing to make it happen this year." Jeesh.

I didn't meet Nick until I was 30 and he was 31. The year I turned 29 I realized that I was putting my life on hold waiting for the right man. So I stopped that and began living my life for me, the way I wanted to be living.

Enter the man who wanted to share that with me, whose life I wanted to share.

I wish you goodness and confidence.