just a quick update on me and my life

brother and father hospital update- my brother is doing ok. hopefully released this week. my father is my father. this situation has not been good for the past 3 years. it's probably not going to get any better. dave told me at least i had a chance to say goodbye and in some ways he is right. in ther ways i never had the chance- the father that i knew growing up is long gone and no i din't have the chance to say goodbye. one seizure and he was gone. some days he can remember he had a daughter and some days no. some days i am 6 years old and other days non-existent. no matter what he doesn't know me as i am today. that hurts more than anyone might ever know.

job update- my job is driving me crazy. i am absolutely bored. i've told my boss i need a challenge but i don't know if that has sunk in with her or not as nothing has changed and it has been a while- close to a year.

c. update- i could say more than a few sentences about him and maybe he deserves his own update later on this week. we are together- we are mostly happy- his life is insanely complicated and i still wish that were partly different but at the same time i wouldn't trade him in for anything. if anything it makes me want to hold onto him more.

other updates- i need to start writing more- there has been so much going on. there are stories i wish to tell. there are emotions that i need to sort through. all of it needs time. but generally life is good- complicated but good